The Sun Also Fries Us

Picture it. You, a reasonably sane person, are talking to me, your esthetician, about you skin. Smart move. You express concern about some wrinkles popping up around your eyes, general discoloration in your skin, and that dryness that has been bugging you. I, being a trained and educated professional, have a very simple answer. Stop tanning. That’s when you show signs of what must be heat stroke.

“But, I’m only getting a base tan.”

“I only tan in beds, not outside.”

“All the celebrities are doing it.”

“I need the Vitamin D.”

“Tan fat looks better than pale fat.”

“I’ll stop tanning when I’m older.”

I try to be patient, but enough is enough.

There is no such thing as a base tan. A steak cooked in the oven will still burn on the grill.

Tanning beds are just as bad as outdoor tans. And don’t believe that junk about beds where you can’t burn. While UVA rays are less likely to cause burning than UVB rays, they are suspected to have links to malignant melanoma and immune system damage. Also, they make you look older, faster. So there.

The stars do not actually tan. Usually. The smart ones use fake tan and bronzers. Besides, some stars drink and drive, and then break their probation, so get some better role models already.

Now you are trying to make me angry. Unless you are a vampire who only eats junk food, you get enough Vitamin D. If you have a health concern, go to a doctor, not the tanorexic teenager at the Tan-N-Go. Seriously.

Fat is fat. Tan or pale you take up the same amount of room. Trust me, I know.

The incidence of two types of skin cancer has nearly tripled among women under age 40. But, you could wait till you get cancer to stop. I’m sure that make sense somewhere.

Now that we are on the same page, and you have come to your senses. Let’s talk product.

Sunscreen is easy. Sunscreens' active ingredients do one of two things: Chemical screens like octisalate (which blocks UVB) and avobenzone, aka Parsol 1789 (which blocks UVA), absorb UV rays; physical blocks like zinc oxide and titanium dioxide reflect sunlight altogether. I prefer a physical block for sensitive skin. SPF 15 to 20 is great for the face. SPF 20-45 for the body. Apply 20 minutes before going out, and reapply every hour. SPF 15 everyday, no matter what.

So, now what? Well, lets get that sunscreen we talked about. I love Aveeno Continuous Protection SPF30 and Aveeno Baby SPF 55. But anything non-greasy and oil-free is swell. If you can get sweat-proof, do it. You will thank me later.

When you want a tan and you want it now, St. Tropez Whipped Bronze instant self-tanning mousse is what you need. Streakless, instant color dries in just 60 seconds for a perfect tan anytime, anywhere. Its self-adjusting mousse is oil free and complements any skin tone, while the tan deepens over 3 hours - all without the damaging effects of the sun. Also their Body Polisher is divine and will help your new tan last longer. Try a gradual tan lotion like Neutrogena Build A Tan to maintain your color. Shave, scrub, and tan. Move on with life. No more excuses.